I think we all struggle with who we are. We can get caught up in what others think about us and we want to fill their expectations. But in so doing, we can actually lose sight of who God wants us to be. We are not here to be everything for everyone. We must realize that we do have limitations and be honest about them. I know that trying to be a ‘good’ person all the time can actually be harmful to yourself and a relationship. My husband wants to be a ‘good’ person by always doing what he thinks will help someone out and this leads to resentment as it turns into being taken advantage of. I keep telling him we have a word in the English language that is perfectly acceptable to use and it is “no”. Sometimes we just have to be honest with ourselves and others and simply say, “No”. We have Christ Who is the only Savior, we were never meant to be a savior to anyone. Learn to accept yourself, your limitations and relax so that you can truly be what God meant for you to be and let Him do the rest.
When Your Thoughts Try to Get the Best of You
I’m sitting in a local cafe as I write these words. I can hear the quiet hum of voices and an occasional burst of laughter. Music plays from speakers somewhere above. I’ve been here about an hour and I’ve hardly even noticed it. Now I pause and take in the beat, the words. As I do I realize I’ve heard this song before.
Our brains work in much the same way. We go through our day and our minds are filled with conversations, ideas, thoughts and memories. We usually have background music playing too. These are the broad statements we believe about our lives. They are usually so familiar we don’t even pay attention to them. But sometimes the lyrics to our musics are tainted with lies. And when that’s the case, we need to pause and turn the dial back to truth.
Next time you’re feeling anxious or sad but you’re not sure why, stop and listen to the background music of your mind. Then try this process…
1) Listen for the words – What are your thoughts actually saying? You might hear, “I’m not enough.” “My life doesn’t have a purpose.” Or “I’m not loved like I want to be.”2) Ask Jesus, “Is this true?”3) If the thought isn’t true, ask Him, “What do you want my heart to hear instead?” Listen closely for the answer and if at all possible, write it down.
4) Confirm what you’ve heard through finding verses that relate. (I love sites like crosswalk.com and biblegateway.com because they let you search by keyword or topic.)
5) Keep a running list of the above and review it regularly. Over time the background music of your mind will change.The song coming from the speakers has shifted. I tilt my head to listen. My mood brightens and I smile as I sip my coffee. It’s amazing what music can do.
And the most important song of all is the one that’s within you.